Large head, very small brain

I havent posted in a very long while. A lot has happened since.

However, the major problem is- i've been back at country heights 4 times, and during those 4 times i've been around internet connection, it wasnt possible to log in into blogspot because i had already forgotten what my password. i typed it again and again, and i was certain that i typed it right. i even typed in the letters in slow motion. like i saw every frame, and which keys my fingertips touched. i was also positive that i didnt hold the key too long, so instead of f looks like fffff. okay. well, it didnt work out. i was too lazy to even hang around the computer too long so, after i checked whats hot whats not on facebook, i logged off. i dont google up juresic dinosaurs names up like jehan. seriously.

only tonight rolled around, and i realize how much time i have to spend being a lephrechaun, slumping (is that even a verb?) my omnipresent ass on the computer, and look up my password. the confirmation email was sent to my yahoo account,,,

only then i realised!!!!!! the email said,

Hi there,

Your blog, http://boydschidtt.blogspot.com/, is associated with the Google Account username diannevauxx@yahoo.co.uk. Please use this Google Account username to log in to Blogger and access your blog.

yahoo.co.uk!!! now it makes sense. it wasnt a password error, it was my goddamn brain locking the yahoo.co.uk into a bloody brain central deposit box!

excuse that.
i realised, as i read through other people's blogs, while wiping my tears away seeing how other people are so in-control. so well written, so FUNCTIONING that i feel totally (i can't believe i'm using this word) depressed. instead of writing of how glitzy and glamorous my life has been as an intro to this post, i actually wrote about how terrible my brain is. i think a lot of people do. people write about their brain when they didnt get a 4flat, or an academic award, thus they punish themselves, then conjure up a method to enhance their brain energy by eating brain pills, listen to dolphins, or eat some sort of rare vegetable. my way of enhancing my brain capasity, is well, uhh, i have no idea. i would probably go smoke after i write this.

my happiest spoonful in 2009 would be... (notice that i write this 19 days after new year)

no wait, u cant write about happiest spoonful at the start of the year. u write happiest spoonful at the end of the year. as like, a summary.

zip that. i have a good feeling about 2009. i already told jehan this, when we were in the car, exchanging plans of taking over the world by being an ambitious, SMART, classy woman. yes, i know the life cycle will roll over me, leaving me all squashed like a worm with contact lenses (notice that i didnt mention spectacles.. i am very pretty now, taha!). the point is, i have a sure sort of feeling about 2009. at the same time, i'm unlearning asiaworks, such that i want to be a part of life itself. my life. i want to breathe through it. i want to un-install the program that has been set. i sound like a friggin hard disk. i want course to take its place. be it evil or good. (i noticed how i wrote evil before good)

the objects that are holding me back from steering the boat, is a 2009 planner, a laptop, and the compass that will point to whatever i want the most.

which are imran, money, a pack of dunhill cigarettes, bo, a new pair of shoes, a fair lady (which i dont even know how to drive), and a ticket to go around the world.

the compass needle wouldnt stop spinning due to how indecisive and impractical i can get, thus in the end, it will break, scream, and slap me.